These zephyrs blow over the barren land
Once a sea-shore with seagulls soaring
These sunsets are only full of longing
Once with meeting anticipations hovering.

The falling leaves remind me
Of your gentle, caring touch
Those moments of confusion come up
With the clouds of dust

Clouds of dust rising below
Our feet that once in unison were
Separated, yet connected
Through memories- clothed and bare.

I fall in love, I rise in love
I live in love, in love with you
I'm alive by the meagre interactions
On the leaf of memories, like a suspended dew.

I know I can't stay so forever
Without you around I feel numb
Every wish is a cry of despair
Many would gladly be replaced by some.

You, a constant part of my remembrance
The source of strength, the source of joy
There isn't any life I'd like to live
And yet I cannot even die.

I long to hear your voice
Long to see you smile
It hurts when others don't realize
The purity of my rhyme.

I've been yours at every stage, during these testing times
I 'm still yours at this stage, albeit these lines may be a crime.

What Now??

"Love can happen more than once."

It did. And it happened with the same person. Now what?

I remember, not very long ago, I used to exclaim that I would fall in love with Him on each new moment, each new day, again and again. And yet, the same continues. Every new moment. Maybe it shouldn't? But it does.

"The feel seems to never end".

The novelty remains even after...what? 5 months? Even after... even after it wasn't supposed to.

So what is to be done now? I can't go back. Or, rather, even if I go back, He can't come back.

Really? He can't? Or what if He actually can? Can He? Are there any possibilities?

Realizing this made me think and visualize a circle. A circle, yes.
As in, there are love- triangles, sometimes even love-quadrangles. I only recently discovered a love-circle. Or maybe, an admiration circle. The admirers are infinite points. Must feel quite loved, eh? But isn't He worth it?


And, so, I come back to the starting point. What is to be done, now?

The Sunset

Every sunset strikes as a metaphor to a sun setting on MY horizon.

The sun of memories. Of Golden Memories. Of memories containing beautiful times that might never happen again. Every sunset limits my horizon by the dread of those moments never happening again; with the struggle towards, as well as against accepting the past as the past and letting go. Every sunset encourages me only in the procedure for indulging in memories and hoping against hope for some sort of miracle. Some sort of veil uncovering itself showing a land where reality is interspersed with fantasy. Hoping for certain dreams to materialize, certain hopes to still be considered as 'hopes'.

The first glance at the dark-orange blob on a perfectly shaded canvas of the sky reminds me of words in a voice I have been yearning to hear, even in my dreams-

"The sunset or the sunrise? You expect me to CHOOSE from them? Are they even comparable?"

No, They aren't. Of course, they aren't. Both of them have their own unique beauties. Their own unique charm. The former has its beauty of instilling new hopes and oozing freshness. The latter has its beauty in the revival and reliving of memories.

I wonder if MY description of the sunset is any bit general.

Undoing things or Letting them be?

I'm apprehensive...I'm scared.

I want to do things and after almost doing it, I undo it. Why? Merely because I'm not certain about how those things would be taken by the other side. A single word can act as a piece of blade and break apart already fragile strands of a bond. On the other hand, a single word can also act as a tonic and strengthen the bond. But what I keep getting confused about is, when are those words tonic and when are they pieces of blade when they come from me.

And then, should I be impulsive and spontaneous or should I think twice before doing things? Which is better? Which is my priority? Which would suit which situation?

Almost everything depends on the situation. I repeat, almost everything. So how do you identify the manner of reaction for these changing situations?

Experience is the best teacher, they say. How much experience is enough experience? How much experience would suffice to answer these queries?

I am yet to be acquainted to the right times of acting in the right manner. Yet to teach myself to classify the wrong time, right things and the right time, wrong things.

Even yet to understand my perception of the changing situations along with the perceptions of the same situations on the other side.